Second Practice Onion Article

(I think this one is a little better. It's longer at least.)

Obama's Economic Stimulus Plan Includes Obama Memorabilia

President Obama announced Friday that Obama memorabilia will account for nearly 20% of his $900 billion stimulus plan.

"We are struggling as a country. Parents can not provide for there children because they have lost their jobs. It is the Government's responsiblity to provide for its citizens and that is why I am signing this stimulus package with 200 thousand 'January 20th, 2009 commemorative plates,'" Obama said in his speach on Friday.

The package also includes 2 million silver dollars with "Obama's likeness embossed on the front," 100 thousand Obama bobble heads and 30 thousand January 20th Inauguration plaque with Obama's speech "etched into 24 karate gold."

The plan is meant to help out the nations failing QVC economy. "QVC is the cornerstone of the American economy. If we don't help now, Americans all over the country will no longer be able to buy worthless junk over the phone," Obama said on Friday.

Sandy Wallis, a retired teacher from Greenwich NY, says she supports the plan. "I would hate to see QVC disappear. I bought this Hello Kitty diamonique sterling pendant for only $79, with five easy payments. And that's something you can wear anywhere."

While the QVC plan is becoming very popular with the public, Economists and Republican Senators both say they see flaws.

"We all want to support the bobble head initiative," said U.S. Senator Lamar Alexander (R-Tenn.). "But I think we need to do more. We need to also help the falling Sky Mall stocks and keep Sharper Image from bankruptcy. Our nation's crap economy is suffering a crises and QVC alone can not be its sole supporter."